A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

hi

What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

2 women were sitting quietly.

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

9/11

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...