Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

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Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

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knock knock go away

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whats black? a black man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 24

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Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

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What is 9 + 10? 21

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A white man, a black man, an Asian man, a Mexican man, a subasian man, an Austrailian man, and a Canadian white man. That's it.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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Why did the monKey fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What is 8 times 4? 32

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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