When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

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This is an anti-joke.

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Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

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Why did the black man cry? He had no rights.

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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I used to make jokes about taking arrows to the knee then i beat the game

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

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A boy found a nickel on the street. So he went to the ice cream shop and bought a gumball with the nickel.

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Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

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Gay's rights

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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So a catholic priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a beer.

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There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

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what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

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A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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