I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

Q: What is a man? A: A miserable little pile of secrets.

What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. "Knock, Knock" "Who's There?" "Not Sally."

A.how does a penguin change a light bulb? A.the same way all other penguins change a lightbulb

what do you do when a dog bites your ear off? you see that you are bleeding then you scream.

Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

womens rights to vote

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Haikus can be fun But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Hi. Hello. I live in Iowa. Same. Im your neighbor. Same. I like corn. Same. Im gay. Same. HAHAHAHAHAHA gotcha! No i really am gay and the fact that you thought that was funny saddens me deeply.

My butt!!!!!!!!

Knock knock. Death.

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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