What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

knock knock who's there? boo don't do this joke again- i'll make you cry if you finish it don't cry it is just a knock knock joke teeheehee

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

What is 9 + 10? 21

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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