Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down -122

BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Barack Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down -121

why did the man die? because he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +122

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +84

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops