What's white and sticky? Glue.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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lol

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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