Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

Woman's Rights

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

what did the black man say to the white man? hi

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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