There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

It's only racist if you consider them people.

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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