What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

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Youve got to spell the name right you dead dylan fuck

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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Society has given up on chairs that spin.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Coming home and discovering that your wife has drowned your kids in the bathtub

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Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

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Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

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Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

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The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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