What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

Gary: How many sides does a triangle have? Juan: 2? Gary: Nope, it's 3, nice try

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

How many anti-joke fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Or two if it's a really high bulb and you need a second person to hold the ladder for safety.

Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

Womens' Rights

If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

Q.what does the kid scream when he see's a creepy man in a big van pull up? A. ICE CREAM!

What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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