A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why are fat people fat? Because they like food.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than 3 black people? 4 Black people

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Anne Frank get for christmas? Nothing Anne Frank is jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Muffins can't speak therefor it said nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Jesus REAREAREAREVENAGNCEREALLY SAY when he was walkin on da waterz? And I bless this object which shalth now be known as the surfboard, Amen. Seriously, im a Christian, that sounds kinda cute in a weird way... Like aww, thats why he walked on water, not because of terrifying super powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Gary: How many sides does a triangle have? Juan: 2? Gary: Nope, it's 3, nice try

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops