What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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Sally sold seashells by the seashore but she didnt make any money of course. seashells on the shore can be picked up off the beach for free

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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Your social life.

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If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

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pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

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Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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What is 8 times 4? 32

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What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

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Good boy

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why do you care?

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

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What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

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There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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