i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Once upon a time, your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

thumb_up thumb_down -119

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -169

What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down +173

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops