I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

What's older than history? Pre-history.

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

Yo momma is SO black.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

British Dentistry

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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