why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

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What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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How do you know if your teacher is gay? Ask him if he is gay.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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how do you confuse a blond?

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

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Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

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So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

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I said I hate niiggers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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