There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

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How do you kill a retard? Pour gasoline on him and light him on fire.

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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Wanna know something fishy? A fish

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Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops