Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

one swipe, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAH! know what i mean, Paul....are you ok?....nooo...., you know the lettuce in antarctica is pretty questionable

A man made a sandwich.

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Everyone knows a sandwich made with bacon, lettuce, and tomato is a BLT, but what do you call a sandwich made with tomato, bacon, and lettuce? A BLT.

what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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