I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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96

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

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Anthony Dephillips is handsome

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When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

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What do you call the twin towers? An airport

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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An atheist walks into a church

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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