how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

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So two clowns walk into a bar... . . . . . . . . . . They died

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

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Like if you like big tits.

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You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

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terry stockton is straight

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two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

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I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

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Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

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Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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