how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

A man made a sandwich.

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Why did the kid kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

Knock knock Who's there? You're adopted.

Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

what did the blind man say as he past the fish market? he asked one of the fisherman if they had any fresh catch that day and bout three tuna steaks for his wife and son

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Lack of experience.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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