A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

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What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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A.how does a penguin change a light bulb? A.the same way all other penguins change a lightbulb

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

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what do you call a group of people who are systematiclly ruining a once well run family football club? steve kean , the venkys, and there advisors

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? No one OK???? BYE, BYE U still there? Yeah Umm . . . ?

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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What did the podiatrist say to the proctologist? That athletes foot fungus is clearing up nicely.

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Penis

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where did sally go after the bombing? everywhere.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

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When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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