I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, you racist.

What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

i have yougurt with tractor

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Orange" "Oh, hey."

Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You finish on her teddy bear.

Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is less Than dinner for two

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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