Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

Two muslims walk into the bar, Everybody continues with their daily lives. One should not be judged by their race or religion as all humans on earth are as equal as one another and should be treated the same way..... And then the building blew up.

whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

A horse walk into the bar, the bar tender asked, why the long face the horse unable to understand English takes a shit and walk away.

roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A white guy, a hispanic guy, and asian, a black guy, a philipiean guy, and a wait what am i doing?

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

Why did the Afircan child die? He had AIDS.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

some of these so called "anti-jokes" are real joke s- they don't belong on anti-joke. they are very funny but are traditional jokes that use cliched non-sequitor as punchlines.

Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

What's grey and can't fly? A Parking Lot.

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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