Knock Knock! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I had my period 3 days ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was the boy sad? He had just had his legs amputated and will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Matty B

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the kid kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Male penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops