A baby seal walks into a club.

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

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What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is a bully. every day 7 ate 6's books and punches him. 6 would go to 9 but today 7 ate 9

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Whats black and has no ring? LeBron James

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the comment about daniel was fron brock

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What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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What's worse than cancer? Death.

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knock, knock. come in.

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Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Billy. Billy who? Billy your next door neighbor, I need to borrow some sugar. Ok, come in.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A human pretending to be a dog A human pretending to be a dog who? Errr...I mean...woof

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they all can run jump steal and shoot

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give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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