What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Having legs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Penis

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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Homosexuals are gay.

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

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Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

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YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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Why couldn't the man walk? Because his leg is broken.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

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when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

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why is santa so jolly? hes not hes a fictional character made up by our parents imagination

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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