A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

9/11

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

Your mom walks into a bar.

What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

why did the man die? because he died.

Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

Once upon a time, your face.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

Knock knock. Who's there?

Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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