what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

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What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

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What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

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LOL May Wong

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Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

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A. Your mamma is so stuiped she starved to death in a grocary store.

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

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A blonde, a redhead, and Asian are talking. They are friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops