If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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What's long, hard, and wet? A difficult college exam that fell in a puddle of water

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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Hellooooo whos there? Its me fred Fred? A Canadian

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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Women Driving.

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What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

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You's so ugly you should consider facial reconstruction surgery if it's covered by your insurance.

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How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

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So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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69

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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