Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

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Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

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A thin man walks into a Grocery Store. He trips, hits his head and is killed instantly. There are several children present and they are scarred for life.

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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What's the deal with airline food?

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

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Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

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What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops