What did the man say to the really attractive woman? We are different genders

What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

What did the children in India eat for dinner?

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

96

Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

An asian without a future.

Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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