how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Yo momma is SO black.

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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hi

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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