what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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A Jew, an African American, and a homosexual are on an island. They all came to Manhattan for different reasons and are enjoying the lives they've built there.

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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