Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

ask if someone wants to hear a joke then say "never mind"

How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

Gay's rights

Q: What is 2 + 2? A: Beastiality

What's the difference between women and a bucket? before 1923, women didn't have the right to vote. Bucket's still don't.

How many blonde's does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to hold the ladder and one to peel the carrotts

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

Kendall and Nick Fredick

Pickles

knock. knock. whos there? BOWLING SHOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what has the same importance as mothers day? fathers day

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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