Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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hi

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What did the monkey say to the owner of the world's rarest stamp? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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a person cries in the corner you go over to them and rape them

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knock knock come back later i'm taking a shower!!!

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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There once was a girl named sally with no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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