Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

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What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

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There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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wanna here an anti joke scroll down

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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Republicans

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What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

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What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

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Yo mamas so fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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