Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

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(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

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How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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a child logs on to anti-joke.com and proceeds to post dead baby jokes and jokes with punchlines that suit the build up. i am bitterly disappointed as are all the other fans of anti-joke.com who understand the humor of anti jokes

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If you are my friend like it!

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What's worse than having the name Riley Bathurst? being shot in the head by a black guy.

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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Whats better than an anti joke? Having sex with a supermodle

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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