Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

British Dentistry

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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