Q: What did Delaware? A: A black dress. She was on her way to her father's funeral.

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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What did little Sally say to the clown after the party? 'For someone who specializes in entertaining children of a young age, I am slightly underwhelmed at the degree of humor my friends and I have derived from your jokes today.'

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What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

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How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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Why did Doctor Who visit Ancient Greece? Because has a time machine and has that ability

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Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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