Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why do you care?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

mark is mark

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

thumb_up thumb_down -12

NOTICE: If you have noticed this notice then you will have noticed this notice is not worth being noticed

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

obama

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops