Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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9001

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

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What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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Why are spanish people good at soccer? Hard work and a long-life time comitment

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How do you keep a blond in suspense?

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DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

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A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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69

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What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

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2 women were sitting quietly

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why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops