Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

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What did the clock say? The time.

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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On a scale from Casey Anthony to Sandusky, how much do you like children?

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The game!

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--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

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why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

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[Insert Stereotypical Joke, And Insert Logical Answer Here] Anti - Anti-Joke

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

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Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Transformers: Shadow of the Dark Risen Monday. The Autobots starring in more explosions, more random fighting! Zero narrative nor explanations! One constant explosion trough the whole movie! But do not worry! Did you believe that the final battle versus Optimus Prime and his evil Dimensional counterpart Optimal Evilus would be the ones fighting at standing at the end? NO! This is far more exciting! 16 year old Nick is seeking the love of his life in the 42 year old grandmother Mirabella Torres, and ends up proving his love by pushing the button that instantly kills Optimal Evilus`s ultimate form Evilus Supreme! "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Honest reviews. "Yeah we love it that part where Optimus Prime forgets who is fighting and beats the shit out of Jazz and his totally non racist MonkeyBot Obamabus, seriously, this needs to die" Transformers lovers. "You gotta love that scene where Megatron starts blowing up his own allies because explosions!" Transformersmoviefans.com. "So why did Optimus Prime refuse to kill his Evil dimensional brother thing? I mean he was from another dimension, why did he go around like "NO HE IS MY BROTHER IN SOME DIMENSION! YOU MUST INSERT THE SPARK INSIDE ME DEEP INSIDE ME NICKY! DEEPER!" People Magazine. "So this time they just made the Decepticon`s weakness a button so small only a human can push it huh?" People... Just people. "MY EAAAAAAAAARSSSS!" MICHAELBAYGAVEMEPTSD.ORG. Moral: Wow it says skynet is watching all the time now at solvemedia, unexpected considering the first thing I posted was the terminator XXXV thing. So, is it some sort of easter egg feature? I mean I would not believe myself if someone told me that.... Which is actually what makes this kinda creepy...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops