How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

Knock Knock whose there your biological parents REALLY No

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

Q: What is 2 + 2? A: Beastiality

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

A man is walking with a boy through a swamp. The boy says to the man, "I'm scared." The man says, "You think you're scared, I have to walk out of here alone."

Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

A conversation between friends ( or some what.) Joe: I'm thinking about going out of state for college ... Rick: your mom went to college! Joe: yes she did Rick that's why shes a docker and my families rich.

neil patrick harris

The Pope

Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

connor sucks

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...