Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

wanna hear a joke? no.

Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

Why'd the boy fall off his bike? The holocaust

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

toast points

Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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