Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

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Why did the cat die? Because it got shot by a teenager who was promply put in juvi and was fined $100,000 for animal abuse. The parents gave up on him and didn't pay the fine or bail and left their son to rot in jail.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the results of his AIDS test

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins the china town

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

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Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

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Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

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Your mother's so fat, her blood type was Ragu

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What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

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You know what is not cool? Fire.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a sink? I don't know i forgot to turn the garbage disposal off

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So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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thermodynamics?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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