- Anti Joke

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

How do you survive in the wilderness? You nail an orphan to a rock underwater.

How do you keep a blond in suspense?

Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

69 this is the part where we na na na na every good song needs a na na na na wake up at night screaming na na na na my grandmothers nickname is nana

Two gorillas swing into a bar and are promptly escorted out because the gorillas are alcoholics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.