so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

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how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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read this

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A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

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Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

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What's black and white and red all over? Colors

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little Tommie is dead In a body bag Going to the dumpster Behind my house

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vbh

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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