Fiats

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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What's small and harmless, but deadly when thrown at high speeds? A baby.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

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What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish, just because it has a disability it doesn't mean you can treat it any differently

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why was the boy running? because his skin was burning off

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

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A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

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five high school freshmen get into a car on a Friday.They are too busy looking forward to the weekend that they speed into oncoming traffic and all die in a horrible collision.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern ppoorrnnoo-graphic collections.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

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This is my first attempt at making an anti-joke: That's was it.

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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so a dyslexic man sold his soul to Santa

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How do you know when you're on a Jewish golf course? The players don't yell 'FORE' they yell '$3.99!' @Obsequiously

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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