Women Driving.

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What do you say to Michael and Justin? The Game

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Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

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Why did the girl jump of the control tower??? She didnt I lied.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Is this where I type the joke?

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

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Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

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What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

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Deadly cancer.

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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