Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

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The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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My phone rang. So I answered it.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

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A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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